The Weekly: 14
hello people I've never lied to, and hello guy who, after my last show, I didn't immediately correct when you thought I'd just returned from touring the country... [please forgive me!]
[UPDATE! I met this guy a few months later and apologized. His name is Brandon. He's a nice guy and another aspiring comic.]
This week’s The Weekly is coming at you from New York. It’s the city that never sleeps, due in part to the honking cabs, wailing fire engines, and exploding pressure cookers.
They caught the guy so quickly! Now the real questions begin. Was he working alone? How much did his wife know? Is he proud to be the first US terrorist with a BMI north of 30?
A New Site!
You may have noticed I've redone my website. I say "I've redone" it like I actually did something. The moment I said "I think I need to redo my website" Wiff was ALL OVER IT. She redid the entire thing. She did a pretty good job, no? [SAY YES.]
I owe an apology to Hermitage, PA.
All 16,000 residents of Hermitage [nobody] wrote in saying that their proud city was NOT home to the Pirates Treasure Casino [sic]. I stand corrected, and apologize to each and every one of them. The actual home of Pirates Treasure Casino [sic] is beautiful Butte, MT. [Oddly, no one from Butte wrote in to claim it?]
Oh Butte…how could you not think you’d be the perpetual butt [ha] of so many sophomoric jokes? In hindsight, [oy!] why didn’t you just change the spelling to Beyute, Byute, or Shithole?
[Back to the Casino for a moment… I’m worried that I’m missing some sort of grammatically correct interpretation of "Pirates Treasure Casino". Is it actually written correctly? Am I over thinking this? Is there real Pirates Treasure?!?]
I performed for a packed house [6 people and 4 waiters] again this past Tuesday at Gotham Comedy Club. I must say the standing ovations before and after my sets are starting to get old. Don’t get me wrong, I appreciate it. I’m feeling the love. But at some point a guy’s gotta tell some jokes.
And it’s so awkward after my set when all the other comedians [who were also standing and ovationing] are weeping because they didn’t get the reception I did. I comfort. I tell them they’ll get there someday. But all the consoling is cutting into my joke writing time. I guess that just comes with the territory of being a compassionate phenomenon.
There were some really strong comedians there, folks I think you should totally watch. This was my first time seeing Wali Collins and I really liked him. Karen Bergreen was funny as usual. Saw Tim Alexander for the second time… That guy is really good. Special Congrats to the few folks whose first time it was up there! You know who you are [even though you don’t subscribe to this newsletter.]
Oh, for those that couldn’t make it to the show, you can, as usual, view the video here. Note that the page is password protected. And the password is only handed out when you sign up for my newsletter. If you’ve forgotten the password drop me a note on the Contact page.
5 at 5
If you’re in NYC and would like some free, fun entertainment this Saturday morning [11:30]…
Gotham Comedy Club is hosting a free seminar entitled “You Can Do Stand-Up Comedy”. Though the title is misleading [only those of us with God-given talents can do stand-up], it will be a great opportunity to learn about stand-up. A lot of folks take stand-up classes to level-up their public speaking abilities and this is a great way to learn more about those classes. It should be fun, it’s free, and it’s open to anyone. It’s also free. [Did I mention it’s free?]
Oh! And, it’ll be hosted by the aforementioned Karen Bergreen, Wali Collins, and the hilarious Harrison Greenbaum. I’m putting a special plug here because I want to earn brownie points with the club and the producer. I'm going and looking forward to it. Let me know if you’re going and we’ll make sure to sit together. [Or not, if you’re totally weird.]