This was an actual audition I sent in for a commercial. Somehow I sent the full, unedited audition. Two minutes of me standing in front of the camera—with the dead air. Or, as I hope they see it, being an artiste—with the pretentious e. I slate my name and height at the beginning, which is normal. But then I walk away. Which is idiotic. Two minutes of me muttering to myself. Alternating between running the line and thinking I should be mopping the floors. Somehow I managed to book the role…