Pasta Burro e Parmigiano (For Americans: “Alfredo”)

Last updated: December 20, 2025

Serves 2

Ingredients

2 L water
20 g kosher salt
175 g capellini
30 g really good French butter
30 g Parm-Reg, grated

Directions

2 L water
20 g kosher salt

Heat the water and salt in a large pan over high heat.

175 g capellini

Add the pasta to the water, and cook for 2 minutes less than whatever the al dente time is. Transfer to another pan large enough to toss the pasta and turn the heat to medium. Reserve 350 ml (about a cup and a half) of the pasta water, though you’ll likely only need 200 ml.

30 g really good French butter
30 g Parm-Reg, grated
Reserved pasta water

Add the butter and toss to create the sauce. Remove the pan from the heat and give it a minute to cool down before adding the cheese. If you add the cheese while the pan’s too hot, it’ll turn into glue. Add the cheese and a splash of the reserved water and stir or toss to combine. The sauce should be fairly thick, thick enough that there shouldn’t be extra sauce in the bowl when you finish eating. Almost all of it should stick to the noodles.

Apple Cider Simple Syrup

Ingredients

250 g apple cider
250 g light brown sugar

Recipe

Microwave method:
Add apple cider and light brown sugar to a heatproof bowl and microwave on high until it boils, 3-5 minutes depending on the power of your microwave. Carefully remove from the microwave and stir until the sugar is completely dissolved. Cover with plastic wrap and cool to room temperature. Transfer to a glass or plastic squeeze bottle and refrigerate.

Stovetop method:
Note: You can also make this on the stovetop. Add the brown sugar and apple cider to a small saucepan set over high heat. Bring to a boil. Stir to dissolve all the ingredients. Cover and cool to room temperature. Transfer to a glass or plastic squeeze bottle and refrigerate.

Mint Simple Syrup

I love mint almost as much as I love adding mint to cocktails.

Ingredients

50 g mint leaves (JUST THE LEAVES)
200 g water
200 g sugar

Recipe

Add water and sugar to a saucepan and heat over medium. Or high. It doesn't matter. Once it starts boiling, remove from the heat.

OR

Add water and sugar to a pyrex measuring glass and microwave on high until it starts boiling.

Stir until all the sugar dissolves.

Add mint leaves and let cool.

Strain.

5 Minute Quinoa

I'm just gonna come right out and say it...

Quinoa tastes like grunt.

Which is expected since people who talk about quinoa usually fit into one of three categories:

1. health nuts who prioritize pseudoscience over taste [you know who you are],
2. people who claim to eat healthy but overeat whatever health food they're crazing on and,
3. Mexicans.

[One of those is false.]

I'm in the fourth category:

Culinary Geniuses.

“Quinoa tastes like grunt.” — Anthony LeDonne

I love quinoa not because it contains a ton of complex carbohydrates, or because it's a formidable intestinal pipe cleaner, but because it's super easy to cook in bulk and makes a great base for other dishes. [Translation: I'm lazy.]

I make a batch on Sundays and add it to dishes throughout the week.

For breakfast, I fry some quinoa in a little butter/olive oil, mix in some browned greens, and throw a few fried eggs on top.

For lunch, I'll top it with pan-fried salmon, blanched leeks, and beurre blanc.

For dinner, I'll eat a steak and just stare at the quinoa [a man can only take so much fiber].

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Ingredients

Makes 6 Servings

• 350g /  1 box of Quinoa
• 700g / 2.5 C Water/Stock/Broth
  We'll call this the "liquid" below. Get ready.
• Salt to taste
  Side note, the reason restaurant food tastes better is salt. Properly wielded it will make everything taste better. And if you're worried about your sodium intake, check the labels on all the prepared food you're shoveling down your pie hole before cutting salt out of a home cooked meal.
• 0-45g / 0-3 Tbsp Butter/Olive Oil
  We'll call this "fat" below. The quantity used it up to you. The more you use the better it'll taste.

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Recipe

1. Heat the base of a pressure cooker over high heat. Add fat.
2. Add quinoa.
3. Toast for a few minutes. Stirring occasionally. VERY occasionally. Go have a few sips of wine. Check Facebook. You're trying to brown this stuff, not just warm it up. It should smell toasted. This will probably take 5-10 minutes to smell toasty. It's okay if you under toast it. It's not okay if you over toast it [cuz then it's burnt, yo.]
4. Add liquid and salt. Seal pressure cooker and cook for 5 minutes. Start the timer as soon as pressure reaches 1 bar/15psi (usually the second red line).
5. Run warm water over the top of the pressure cooker to depressurize and remove the lid.
6. If there's residual liquid, put it back over medium heat for a few minutes without the lid. If not, you're done!